It really matters who you're with.
It really matters who you're with.
Keep good men company and you shall be of the number.

I have heard such a short story:

A young monk came across a pile of fragrant soil by the side of the mountain. He secretly said that he was surprised and brought him back to the monastery. As a result, the whole house was fragrant.

the monk was so overjoyed that he thought he had met a rare treasure. So cheerfully informed the host, the host took a look and told him: "this is just the most common soil."

"then why is it so fragrant?"

the host asked the monk, "where did you meet the soil?"

the monk thought for a moment and said, "I met in a rose garden at the foot of the mountain."

"that's right, but because I've been in contact with roses for a long time in the rose garden, the soil has the fragrance of roses."

so it doesn't matter who you are, it's who you are with.

with roses for a long time, ordinary soil will curl; close to the manger, fragrant perfume can not cover the stench.

A straw is worthless, but if tied to a crab, the value can be increased by tens of thousands of times.

the reason why Meng's mother moved three times is to choose a suitable learning environment for her children.

"Thrushcross sparrows have different voices, golden rooster birds have different nests"

, if you come into contact with different people, you will have different destinies. If you look at your circle, you will know your future.

if you associate with reliable people, you will become stable and magnanimous;

get acquainted with positive people, you will become cheerful;

when you come into contact with kind people, you will also be broad-minded and Fuzeen will grow.


A reliable person

I have read a summary about reliability before, and I think it is very appropriate:

the so-called reliability: there is an explanation for everything, a reason for everything, and a response to everything.

there are often wise people, but very few reliable people.

Zeng Guofan recorded such a sentence in his family letter: although men are in the Yamen of the Ministry of Etiquette, they do the usual things for the country, they are unremitting, they are organized, and they also have a deep wish.

the meaning of "do not persevere, do everything in order" means to do everything in a down-to-earth manner, not to muddle through, let alone slack off.

everything must be done, and it is reliable to put everything into practice.

reliable people never blow their own trumpet, promise things beyond their abilities, and respond to the demands of others.

since their words are irrevocable, as long as they promise, they will try their best to complete them. Even if you can't finish it, you will take responsibility for your actions to the end.

being with such a person is not only at ease, but also at ease.

but in life, there are more people like this:

clearly promised well in advance, but when approaching, he put off three obstacles and changed his mind.

says well, but uses all kinds of excuses to excuse never taking action.

the confession was promised face to face, and it was forgotten in the twinkling of an eye.

to live with such a man who goes back on his word, if you don't say it, it will be easy to infect unreliable temperament in the long run.

the Analects of Confucius said: "I don't know what a man can do without faith." How can a cart and a trolley do not have a wheel? "

means that a person who goes back on his word is like a car without wheels. Just imagine, how can you go far with such an unreliable person?


A positive person

there is a story in the words of Confucius:

Confucius said that after his death, Zi Xia will make more progress than before, while Zi Gong will be more backward than before.

when Zengzi asked why, Confucius explained:

"if Zi Xia likes to be with people who are wiser than himself, then his moral cultivation will improve day by day, but Zi Gong likes to get along with people who are not as good as himself, and his moral cultivation will gradually lose."

as Confucius said, a circle of positive energy is of great benefit to people's growth.

as is believed in psychology: the vibration frequencies of energy can be transmitted and influenced by each other.

if you are in a positive energy environment, it will attract the same beautiful things, which is what "happy events" says;

if you are in a negative energy environment for a long time, your surroundings will become dim and bad luck will be entangled with it.

such people don't like to see anyone, complain about everything and point everywhere. No matter how much you comfort and encourage them, they all complain and frown.

even if you are good yourself, you will become mediocre if you associate with such people for a long time.

"if you live in a neighborhood, you must choose a neighbor and make good friends."

as talented as Li Bai, his best friend must also be an immortal genius.

like Hu Shi, his good friends are all learned literary masters.

both virtue and art are like Chen Daoming, and most of his friends are artists of noble character.

stay away from negative people and things, and get close to people with positive energy.

"think of the virtuous, but introspect when seeing the unvirtuous"

, interact more with excellent people and learn from their optimistic and peaceful attitude and perseverance.Courage not to be afraid of hardships and dangers.

over time, you will become the same person.


kind people

"living with good people" says:

"and good human settlements, such as entering the room of Angelica dahurica and not hearing its fragrance for a long time, it will be transformed into it. And evil human settlements, such as entering the restaurant of abalone, not smelling it for a long time, but also with it

. "

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means that getting along with good people is like bathing in a house full of aroma from planting orchids. You can't smell the fragrance after a long time, but it is already full of fragrance.

often get along with bad people, just like when you go to a workshop selling salted fish, you can't smell it for a long time, and you blend in with the environment.

the ancients are warning us,

to make friends with people, we must first look at the character of this person.

if this person is well-behaved, you will become clean in your words and deeds if you get to know him; if you have bad conduct, you will certainly get along with him or her.

they seem to have a good acquaintance with you, but in fact they are the most insidious and will not hesitate to hurt you for the sake of profit.

Shen Kuo also sympathized with Su Shi, a master of literature, and only then Junjun gave his hand, but when Su Shi was released, he pretended to boo the cold to ask for warmth, deceived Su Shi's poems, exposed him and reported him, resulting in Su Shi being jailed and nearly lost his life.

it is said that in times of crisis, we should insert a knife for a friend, but a villain often stabs a friend for fame and fortune.

so people, ah, must choose the good and make friends.

to see people depends on their character, and to make friends with others requires sincerity.

kind people will not only lend a hand to support you when you are at a low ebb, but also give sincere blessings when you are in full bloom.

get along with it, enter can embrace full of fragrance, retreat can rely on a firm back.

there are many bad people in this world, but more of them are good people.

when you choose to be friends with kind people, you are conveying kindness and planting Fukuda for yourself.


Xunzi persuaded Xue to say: "Pengsheng hemp, do not help but straight; white sand in nirvana, with it black."

Pengxi grew up in the field of marijuana, so he naturally straightened up without support. The fine white sand mixed in the black soil will turn black with it.

this is what we are familiar with as "those who are close to red and those who are close to ink are black".

people are always imperceptibly influenced by the people around them, so it is important to choose the right circle of friends.

whether you can live safely and smoothly in this life depends not only on yourself, but also on who you are with.

the rest of your life is not long, may you find one or two good friends, no longer go to the lonely shore alone, but also return to the boat through wind and rain.


one book a week, no matter how busy it is, don't forget to recharge it.


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